The other day, Hectic Grandson and I were in the grocery store. It was one of those rare occasions where I actually had 15-or-fewer items in my cart. We’d run out of milk and eggs, so we had to make a quick trip to the store…and I managed to keep myself to only buying 15 items. Four gallons of milk, one carton of eggs, and just ten other items. Honestly, I was pretty proud of myself. When I can get out of the store for under $100 I think I’m doing well, so this was a very special occasion!
The advantage of the 15-or-fewer line is that people usually move through quickly. The disadvantages are (1) there are a lot of people in the line and (2) there is always that one person who does not move quickly. On this day there was a lady with a fistful of coupons that did not match the items she had purchased. If she’d been a normal, socially sensitive person she would have blushed and put away the non-matching coupons. But this dear lady was also the argumentative type, desperately trying to convince the cashier that these were valid coupons.
So there we stood, with nothing to do but wait. Hectic Grandson had gotten restless, so I’d picked him up and was holding him while battling to keep the cart from rolling away. About that time, I started pointing out colors of various objects.
- “My shirt is blue” and he would mimic “blue” as best he could
- “Your shirt is yellow” and he responded “jay-oh”
- “The peas are green” to which he responded “gween”
and on we went with me pointing out the color to all sorts of things.
Eventually I looked up and a Mom and her tween daughter were watching us and talking about how I was teaching him colors. It was so automatic that I didn’t even think about it. There was this bit of confetti time, and nothing to do, so we launched into a learning session. Quite honestly, I do it all the time. It started when my oldest daughter (Hectic Grandson’s Mom) was younger than he is now. I got tired of silence, so I started talking to her, and the talking evolved into teaching.
The kids even coined the term “teachable moments” to explain what I did. At every turn, I’m teaching them something, so they named it.
I’ve been thinking about those teachable moments a lot lately. When I started engaging in those teachable moments 26 years ago, there was only one focus, to teach the kids a specific skill or pass on a singular piece of knowledge. Now that I’m older, I like to think of myself as wiser. I’ve embraced my role as a first teacher much more actively. I’ve realized that part of what I need to teach is how to be a responsible member of society. That sounds awfully lofty, but it’s really more a practical matter. Please and Thank You fall into that category. Holding the door for somebody does too. Generally providing assistance to anybody who looks like they could use it also comes to mind. Generally the sort of small niceties that can really make somebody’s day. Those are all part of what I need to teach my kids and grandkids.
I’ve also come to realize that I want to pass on my values to the next two generations, with the hope that they will pass them on as well. Things like:
- Hard work pays off
- There is no easy street
- You control your destiny
- You are responsible for your own actions
- Honesty is the only policy
- Family comes first…always
Those are the core values that I hold dear, and I want my kids to not only hear them, but to understand why they are important. Hopefully I’ll also be able to teach them in such a way that the kids and grandkids will adopt them as part of their personal credos.
So, if you run into me at the grocery store and you see me talking to a 20 month old about the best value for a can of beans, or the color of all the boxes of cereal, you’ll know that I’m trying to pass on a bit of knowledge that he won’t get elsewhere. Don’t worry though, you’re just as likely to see me talking about helping the elderly to his Mom or discussing the value of various fresh produce vs. the frozen or canned kind with one of his aunts or uncles. If you ride with me in the car, you’ll hear me having teachable moments about all sorts of things. It’s just who I am…and I don’t have any intention of dropping the ball when it comes to helping my kids along on their journeys into and through adulthood!
Love this! Although, for a minute there I was hoping you were going to give a teachable moment to the lady with the wrong coupons!
It’s so true though, finding time to share even the smallest amount of knowledge goes a long way to equip your kids.